Happy Father’s Day! Today is a day for fathers to lounge and relax, swing in a hammock, hit some golf balls and drink beer. Or, to do whatever it is that a dad might want to do.
To all the dad’s out there, I hope you enjoy the day and do what makes you happiest.
To all the kids out there, might I suggest — if you hadn’t planned to do this already — that you call your father and tell him how much you love him.
If you are on good terms with your father, you probably planned to do this anyway. But, I know there are some among you who may find little happiness in Father’s Day. I used to be that way. I hated picking a card and scoffed at the sappiness, because they never expressed how I felt.
If you are angry with your father or have issues with him, consider just letting go of whatever grievance you have. Rather than being filled with anger or sadness why not call him — while you still can — and tell him you love him. That is what I plan to do this Father’s Day.
Over the years I’ve grown closer with my father, but there was a time when I really resented him. I resented that he didn’t spend time with me when I was a kid that he never came to watch me perform with the school band or perform in school plays.
But, as my dad likes to say, “Those days are gone and they’re never coming back.” Before Eckhart Tolle said it, dad was aware. We only have right now, this moment, and, then the next moment and the next. So, there is no use living in the past being upset about what did or didn’t happen because it no longer matters.
All that matters is this moment, right now. And, right now is the time to pick up the phone and say Happy Father’s Day.
It is so simple that it is difficult. To keep an old wound open is to stay paralyzed and unable to truly move forward and grow in life. That is why I will ask my dad to forgive me for ever resenting him or for being a less than responsible child, a prodigal child.
I’m not sure how he will respond, but I’m guessing he will tell me to stop it. I know he loves me and I love him very much. It’s not easy for him to express his feelings toward me, but he has told me more and more over the last few years how much he cares about me and how he wants the best for me.
I realize that whatever was going on in my father’s life when I was growing up he really was there for me. He did the best he could in the only way he knew how. It may have been far from perfect, but it was what he could do.
As we move through life all we can try to do is our best and that will vary day to day. That is what parents do.
I hope you have a wonderful relationship with your father. But, if your relationship has been strained over the years, consider taking steps to make amends. Give him a call. Tell him you love him and see how he responds. And, remember he did the best he could.
I’ll be making my call this morning.